Mouse Rage

Hmm…

Looks different around here, somebody has been redecorating. Thanks Jayne.

Here is an article entitled “Shopping Online Could Be Bad For Your Health”. Apparently, there is an internet shopping phenomenon known as “Mouse Rage”.

The first signs of Mouse Rage:
- Heart rate quickens
- Increased sweating
- Furious clicking of the mouse
- Simultaneous clicking and cursing the screen
- Bashing the mouse

The Top 5 Causes of Mouse Rage
- Slow to load pages
- Confusing / difficult to navigate layouts
- Excessive pop-ups
- Unnecessary advertising
- Site unavailability

I am familiar with rage. I spent most of my twenties and early thirties consumed with it. All kinds of rage, blind rage, tears of rage, road rage and Rage Against the Machine but I don’t get mouse rage.

As a matter of fact, I just now tonight finished my Christmas shopping online. I love it. I went to a new mall in Branson, Mo. the other day. I should have known better. This place is shop after shop full of nothing useful. Traffic, hunting for a parking space, and endless walking; keep it I don’t need it. On the long trek back to my car I got a hot dog. The sign said “Chicago Style” hot dogs. I’ve spent time in Chicago. I should have known better. If you ever see a sign like that, you can guarantee that what you get is not going to resemble anything from the windy city. Why is that?

I know people that don’t want to shop online because they are afraid to give up their credit card info. The only reason this could be is that they must actually have some money to steal. Not a problem for me.

So fight the traffic and the weather. Put up with the crowds and rude, uninformed clerks if you wish. Beat your head against the mall wall. As for me, I will be sitting here at 2:30 a.m. in my sweatpants, sipping on a cup of Maxwell House, smoking a Pall Mall, listening to Tsiji Munoz, shopping ’till I drop.

Related posts

• No related posts.

Tags: mouse rage, online shopping