Hmmmmmmmmmm…. We’ll have to keep an eye on this.
A painful breakup with his wife has prompted a man to put his entire life — his house, his car, his job, even his friends — up for sale online in an effort to start over.
Ian Usher, a British immigrant to Australia, said Tuesday he would auction everything he owns and more on e-Bay starting June 22.
“On the day it’s all sold and settled, I intend to walk out of my front door with my wallet in one pocket and my passport in the other, nothing else at all,” Usher says on his Web site.
Up for bid is Usher’s three bedroom house in the western city of Perth and everything inside it, his car, motorcycle, jet ski and parachuting gear.
Usher says he is also selling a one-time introduction to his friends and a trial run at his job — a plan endorsed by his friends and his employer.
If successful, this is the sort of thing that could prove very damaging to my potential start-up, Fake Your Own Death L.L.C.
At FYOD, we say, “cheer up, you’ve got your whole death ahead of you”. But, this guy-Ian, seems to think he has a loophole, that he can avoid the whole faking death part and accomplish the same thing on the up and up.
He still has to find some chump, some pigeon that wants his old life.
Usher said his life will be sold in one lot, and that bidders should expect to pay more than $390,000, which is the upper end of a realtor’s valuation of his house that he has posted online.
If Ian’s life is so great, why would he want to chuck it in the first place? Hopefully, anyone walking around with 390grrrr in their pocket will have enough good sense to ask themselves that question.
I’ll tell you what, if anybody has that kind of dough and they are thinking of placing a bid for the sloppy seconds of this guy’s dreary existence, I would urge you instead to contact my associates at the Law Firm of E. Morel and B. Javier.
At FYOD, we can set you up with a new house, new friends, new job-the whole nine yards and possibly interest you in some intriguing stock options as well.
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Tags: B. Javier, E. Morel, Fake Your Own Death, Fake Your Own Death L.L.C., Ian Usher
clemdistine wrote,
JDear Mr. Javier:
I think you needn’t concern yourself too much with this development. I believe that the majority of bridge purchasers will continue to require your services. The following Word of the Day from Urban shows the economic trend as much as any grass root indicator. There will be lines at your get togethers. Happy Easter.
You might want to look into our latest offerings from Lunar-faction. We are offering moon acreage for as little as $1.88 per square foot. It could enhance you FYOD enterprises as white flight takes on a new suburban lunar landscape to grow lawns on.
Sincerely yours,
Clem des Tine, PhD / CEO LF
Urban Word of the Day –
Urban Word of the Day
http://www.urbandictionary.com
March 18, 2008: jingle mail
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jingle+mail&defid=1953487
Link | March 18th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
Elmer, Glue, Fudd and Vlecro wrote,
Have you heard from this man?
Samuel Israel III, the former CEO of Bayou Group
Israel disappeared June 9 on the day he was supposed to report to prison. His car was found on a bridge over the Hudson River with the words “Suicide is Painless” - the title of the theme song for the “M*A*S*H” television show - scrawled in dust on the hood.
Because no body was found beneath the 150-foot-high bridge where his car was abandoned, authorities believed from the start that he faked his disappearance.
The 48-year-old Israel, a co-founder and chief executive of the now-collapsed Bayou hedge funds, was sentenced in April to 20 years in federal prison for conspiracy and fraud. He was also ordered to pay $300 million to his victims.
Elmer, Glue, Fudd and Vlecro’s last blog post..Tired of Nostradamus’s old Quatrains: look at your peers’s fresh new Urban Lexicons
Link | July 2nd, 2008 at 1:05 pm
Pribek wrote,
I’m not at liberty to discuss that.
Link | July 2nd, 2008 at 1:49 pm