Mindless Yobs In The News Vol.3
Are you trying to lose a few pounds? Get rid of some extra baggage? Drop that spare tire? Don’t waste your time on diets that just don’t work. Don’t waste your money on a costly gym membership. Exercise is hard!
Your troubles are over, finally, there is a solution.
From the AP.
Broderick Lloyd Laswell says he isn’t happy that he’s down to 308 pounds after eight months in the Benton County jail. He has filed a federal lawsuit complaining the jail doesn’t provide inmates with enough food.
According to the suit, Laswell weighed 413 pounds when he was jailed in September. Police say he and a co-defendant fatally beat and stabbed a man, then set his home on fire.
“On several occasions I have started to do some exercising and my vision went blurry and I felt like I was going to pass out,” Laswell wrote in his complaint. “About an hour after each meal my stomach starts to hurt and growl. I feel hungry again.”
But Laswell then goes on to complain that he undertakes little vigorous activity.
“If we are in a small pod all day (and) do next to nothing for physical exercise, we should not lose weight,” the suit says. “The only reason we lost weight in here is because we are literally being starved to death.”
The suit also asks that the county be ordered to serve hot meals. The jail has served only cold food for years.
The meals, provided through Aramark Correctional Institution Services, average 3,000 calories a day, jail Capt. Hunter Petray told The Morning News of northwest Arkansas for a story Saturday.
Forget Jenny Craig, all you got to do is get thrown in the Benton County jail. And, as an added bonus, you get to kill someone. Rid yourself of some irritating person and lose weight while you sleep.